If my Mom were still alive today, she’d be fascinated by the concept of crowdsourcing. It was Mom who really taught me how to ask for advice, give advice and (perhaps most importantly) ignore advice.
I’ll be honest: I had a horrible adolescence. Hormones and being the nerdy, bookish girl at school made me miserable, and I responded in ways that made people around me miserable. Looking back, I’m not inclined to blame anyone; I just had a more difficult time than many others I knew. But around the time I turned 16, I “began to be human again,” as Mom phrased it. Things got easier.
One of the big changes in my relationship with my parents, especially Mom, was that they gave me advice instead of instructions. Instructions are necessary for children, and sometimes for adults, but when people trust each other’s judgment, advice works best.
Giving advice is not the same as telling someone what to do.
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